TEAM LRSD

Some of my teammates feel they are the best sniper in the LRSD but everybody knows GymboSlice is good at everything he does. If Gymbo is covered properly he will dominate the battlefield and it will open up the battlefield for his team to dominate the game. So I will fill you in on some of my secrets on how I am the sniping champion.

Here’s a little video to explain the importance of sniping. Our snipers Magic Wooshy, HipHopJunky and FeccyJ should learn a lot from this video. I will make sure it is required by them to watch this video before they ever step into battle with GymboSlice.

Gymbo’s Five Tips it Success

1. Find a good spot. Don’t just be sniping in the middle of the street, your fire rate is much slower then everyone else on the battlefield and you don’t stand a chance head to head with someone in a close range battle unless you are GymboSlice.

2. Never Snipe from the same place more the once. If you stay in the same spot eventually someone will watch the Kill Cam and find you. If Kill Cam is off, I still wouldn’t hang around the same spot for that long.

3. Make sure you can see a good portion of the battlefield. If you aren’t covering valuable ground for your team, then you aren’t doing your job.

4. Hit the target. If you miss your cover is blown and your teammates will be killed. This step is a major issues for some of our snipers. You must hit the target.

5. Don’t Die. If you want to be an asset to your team don’t die more then 5 times a game. You cannot die a lot if you want to be a successful sniper. Snipers must rack up 5-7 kills in a row so they can get their team an Air Strike or a Helicopter.

Gymbo will be back next week with more tips on how to be a champion. This is Gymbo’s Corner and thanks for stopping by.

It was a two on one situation and Razor Head was the only one left. Razor snuck in and popped on enemy in the head with his silenced weapon. The other enemy finished planting the bomb and Razor Head sneaks through and rips into him nearly dying. Razor was a little surprised he took out the last two enemies he rested for a couple second and then went in to defuse the bomb and secure the victory.

Then overtime came LRSD was down to it’s last guy and it was Razor Head. Things didn’t look to bright it was another 2 on 1 situation. Razor Head was needing to plant the bomb or kill both enemies. Razor was hiding and then boom a claymore goes off one enemy down. Razor Head is one on one for the victory. All of sudden Razor Head is shot he runs and avoids death. Then another claymore goes off and Razor Head secures the victory with less then 10 seconds on the clock. Some may call it luck but Razor Head calls it clutch.

Razor said after his clutch performance “I was little worried at first, the pressure almost got to me but I pulled through with the clutch victory for my team. I just want to thank Mad Dog and GymboSlice for teaching me everything I know.”

Skippy (fomer Bravo Team Co-Leader) apologizes to the LRSD and Spit Metal.  Skippy has been reinstated into the clan.  Skippy was removed from the clan because his drinking was becoming a major problem.  Skippy got into an arguement with Spit Metal the former leader of the LRSD and was discharged from the LRSD.  Skippy will make his first appearance with the LRSD tonight.

DiaperDandy said ”It’s great to see Skippy back in the line up, as long as he’s not drinking he’s pretty good.”  We tried to rach Mad Dog to ask his opinion but he was unavailable for comment and did not return the media’s phone calls.

The great GymboSlice was available and he said “Skippy is a major asset to this squad.  He was a Bravo team leader and at times carried the Bravo team on his back for entire nights. Hopefully he can return and continue on as the Skippy we know.”   

Here is Skippy’s apology letter: “This is for everyone I disappointed by having my panties in a wad. We all remember that faithful night when Spit was doing his job and reminding me how to do mine. There was no reason to flip out like that and I APOLOGIZE…… I’m doing this because I need the LRSD. Sorry about that everyone.”

 

MadDog Madden Ratings

This Months Mad Dog Madden Ratings are out. There have been some major changes in the Alpha, Bravo and Charlie Teams. The LRSD continues to grow and finalize there rosters. There has been a lot of drama throughout the ranks and there has been plenty of dishonorable discharges throughout the team. Things are looking good for the LRSD.

Before we get to the Madden Ratings lets give a big hand for our monthly award winners.

ButcherBacon’s Monthly MVP Awards

Most Improved: FECCY J – FeccY J has rose up through the ranks and has been making some noise. Runner up - RDAWG and RazorHead

Death Match MVP: Gymboslice – Gymbo has been tearing it up in death match and racking up world records. Runner up - Jeffrosaw

Search & Destory MVP: Takedownspecial – Takedown has been dominating Search and Destroy since the early days. Runner up - Blazed Cubano

Domination MVP: GymboSlice – When in doubt, GymboSlice gets it done. GymboSlice is arguably the most versatile player in the LRSD. Runner up - Blazed Cubano

Headquarters MVP: Kill Tyrant – This is Kill Tyrants game. Runner up - TakedownSpecial

Sabotage MVP: DiaperDandy – Diapers shotgun skills have helped the LRSD earn many quick victories in Sabotage. Gotta go with the Gold! Runner up - Spit Metal

Cover Fire (Saw Gunner) MVP: Jeffrosaw – Jeffrosaws fire support has helped the LRSD get through many tough battles. Runner up - GymboSlice

Shotgun Champion: DiaperDandy – Diaper carries nothing but Gold. Runner up - Spit Metal

Claymore Super Star: BobBigCack – If you hit a claymore its probably BobBigCacks. BigCack can win a game with just claymores. Runner up – Spit Metal

Sniper of the Month: Gymboslice – Who else would it be? GymboSlice , GymboSlice or GymboSlice. Runner up – Feccy J

Hardcore MVP: Jeffrosaw – Jeffro dominates hardcore. He lives for one shot kills. Spray and Pray. Runner up – lX P Xl

Clutch Player: TakedownSpecial – Takedown Does Work! Runner up – DiaperDandy

Overall MVP: Mad Dog – The Return of Mad Dog! The old man returns! Runner up – TakedownSpecial

LRSD – Alpha

TakedownSpecial – 97

GymboSlice – 92

HighFive87 – 90

HipHopJunky – 80 (Suspended)

TheDiaperDandy -90

BobBigCack – 85

Mad Dog (Returns) – 94

Jeffrosaw – 92

Blazed Cubano – 90

Kill Tyrant – 90

Spit Metal – Leaves LRSD

LRSD – Bravo

BobLilCack – 77

Feccy J -80

lX P Xl – 80

RDawg – 82

Nardskilla – 76

Paco5000 – 72

The Ghost 42 – 79

LRSD – Charlie

Magic Wooshy – 72 MIA

RazorHead – 65

GrimPunisher – 68

Odius333 – 60

These ratings are computerized by your online Call of Duty Stats. Here are catagories that make up the overall Mad Dog Madden Rating: Speed / Agility, Accuracy, Awareness, Discipline, Teamwork, Clutch, Demolitions, Assault, SMG, LMG, Sniper, Knife, Air Support, Friendly Fire (Negative Thing).

Spit Metal flipped out and resigned from the LRSD. Spit Metal let his emotions get the best of him and freaked out on his fellow team mates.  Spit Metal normally is very composed in battle but on this night he was in a rage of fury.  The LRSD was struggling and Spit Metal took out his anger on BobBigCack.

Spit Metal said he “I would like to apologize for taking my frustrations out on BobBigCack.  It was not his fault we lost the battle.”  Spit Metal said he will resign and step down as the LRSD leader. Spit Metal said he will retire and would like to be known as a great leader. Spit Metal leaves the LRSD after saving the clan from self-destruction. 

Mad Dog will return to the LRSD and take his rightful spot as leader.  Mad Dog said he has learned a lot being away from the LRSD and has a great deal to teach the young squad.  Mad Dog said “There are a lot of new faces on the LRSD.  We will go in to battle and we will win.”

Jeffrosaw said “It’s great to have Mad Dog back in the line up.  Spit Metal was on a major power trip.  He was crazier then the Mad Dog!”